Reflections and Confessions

Thinking about last Thursday.

Went with Janice to Harvey's. We're driving into the parking lot and in front of us was a car, stopped as the driver walked around to the passenger door to help the elderly woman out of the car. I used to think "Hurry up! I'm waiting! Get outta the freaking car! Let's go! I'm hungry!".

Now, in my mind's eye, I see my (deceased) Mom and 85 year old Dad, trying to shift their tired bodies and arthritic legs to the door. And it takes time. No doubt they're looking forward to a nice dinner with their family - and there's an unsympathetic idiot in the car behind them boiling with anger coz they're taking seconds too long. I am a jerk! I am a jerk! I am a jerk!

But I'm learning compassion.

Thinking about Friday.

Left work at 2pm for my sabbatical with mixed feelings. Apprehension. Unknown future. Feeling dreams and visions - but are they from God or my imagination?

As I left the station I felt happy knowing the station is in good hands with a great staff.

But I also thought - "What am I doing, Lord?. 13 weeks is crazy! What am I gonna do? Will I be closer to You in 13 weeks. Will my family all be alive in 13 weeks? Will I rediscover my lost passions in these 13 weeks? I'm worried about wasting this precious time."

Vowing not to listen to LIFE during my sabbatical, I turned on Q107 as I drove home and heard Ra McGuire singing - "We're Here For a Good Time" - a song that is - well - personal - on many levels.

I swear to you I felt God speaking to me thru this song - "I'm right here, Scott. I'm here now, and I'm here to get you thru all 13 weeks. You will find passion and direction. Trust me."

I admit, those words could be my imagination because it's more likely that I would sing along with Trooper than think on heavenly things at that moment in time. But I don't think so.

By the end of the song my shirt was covered in tears and snot.

Praise God for Trooper.