Yes, I had my hopes up. Actually, I was overly optimistic. Is it wrong to have high expectations?
I'm bummed. sitting at the computer - it's late. I'm reflecting on everything. Our presentation to the CRTC was fabulous. My 88.1 team performed amazingly. My committee who worked behind the scenes to provide valuable information and prayer support were awesome. We did our homework by researching other applications. We role played. We watched the other applications. We hired two research companies. We produced a listener video that oozed passion and heart. And, at the Hearing, the Commissioners seemed to like us.
I felt that all of my years in radio culminated with this application. I am proud to say that it was my best work. I have no regrets. There was nothing more I could do.
However, I knew the strong possibility that another broadcaster could have submitted a better application with more stuff the CRTC liked, acting with deeper pockets and a longer track record. I understand. And that’s what happened. My friends at ROCK 95 got the 88.1 favour. They're good guys.
It’s been 12 hours since I got the lousy news. Maybe after a couple of nights sleep the world will make more sense.
If you know my Toby Mac story, of how one night I felt God’s warm hand on my head, my heart raced and I felt His calling over me last October...what does that mean? Did I mis-read it? Do I think I hear God’s voice but really I don’t?
How about the thousands of people who were praying for favour. Thousands. We prayed and prayed. What happened? Is God saying “no”?
And what about the people who said "God told me you are going to get 88.1"? What's that about? Did they or didn't they? And what about the next time you feel God tell you to do something? Maybe it's not God at all.
Is God saying, “Keep your eyes on LIFE 100.3 and don’t worry about acquiring more?” Maybe. Is God saying, “Hey, I want another Christian company for this job?" Wait...maybe it’s ME. Maybe I’M the roadblock?
From a business angle, I can accept the CRTC decision. From a spiritual angle how do you really know what God wants you to do?
Lots of great questions Scott .. wish I had great ANSWERS.
ReplyDeleteBut I meant what I said in my little comment on your Facebook post ..
THANKS FOR TRYING!!!!
(Most Christian broadcasters are simply too TIMID to move beyond that 50 watt unprotected signal strength that makes it very frustrating for listeners who really want this kind of programming.)
Take some time to process it all .. remember that God has used you and will continue to use you as one of the brightest lights in Christian Broadcasting in this country ..
....I wouldn't give up JUST yet! :)
Pat Murphy
I think we all grapple with this question in our Christian walk. Our faith is not by sight. "Blessed are those who believe without seeing," Jesus said. Hebrews 11 - all of them died before seeing the fulfillment of God's promises to them, but there was no question that God's Hand was upon their lives. C.S. Lewis said sometimes we have to dig a thing up so that someone else can run with it.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I've noticed in my own life is that sometimes people say, "God told me you'll get this," when what they really, honestly mean is, "I really hope you get this." It's mistaking wishful thinking for the Holy Spirit. It's like when someone is gravely wounded (and you see this in movies all the time) and everyone tells him, "You're going to be all right, man, you're going to be okay!" and then he takes his last breath and dies. I try to be very careful to never say, "God told me" until it's after the fact. Before something comes to pass, Christians could really bolster each other's faith if they would stop saying, "God told me" and just say, "I feel led to speak to you," or, "I feel a witness in my spirit." etc.
It can be really confusing when God says no. I really thought God wanted us to adopt and we went through all the hoops over a three-year period, only to be told, "Sorry, we're removing you from our list." It's a big kick in the stomach. What comforts me is knowing that a no answer is just as real as a yes answer. And no often turns out to be a "not now, later." :)
God hasn't abandoned you. :)
Wow, l have also grappled with these questions as many of us have and still do. You are not alone in this. I feel it is a corporate answer. God may have bigger and better on the horizon. It is God's will to have Christian radio in all places, especially Toronto. Leave it all with Him to take care of the circumstances. Keep your eyes focused on Him Scott, not by what you see. We speak those things that aren't as though they are. Remember how long people prayed for Life 100.3? Then the others. It may be that God has another channel that has not come available yet and this was to prepare you for it. You now have it all ready to present. Never underestimate God!! He slips in there and messes things all up and does it in a way that is foreign to us. I speak for many, what you and the team has done was not in vain. Keep your confessions of faith, keep proclaiming Christian radio in Toronto. All of those prayers did not fall to the ground. They have already been answered in the heavenly realm, now we have to wait for it to manifest here on earth. IT IS DONE! You know the radio world and how it happens. God knows how to move too. Keep your face lifted towards the heavens. Do not cease to praise His Holy Name. Thank Him for all that has happened in Toronto and the experience it has given everyone. It says to praise Him in ALL THINGS. Now you are fully prepared, ready for battle and this time it won't take as long. We all love you Scott and you are a man of integrity. You do a great job and you are moving forward. Know that you are being uplifted and bathed in prayer. Blessings brother.
ReplyDeleteHi Scott: I share in your disappointment. However, if you sensed God directing you to submit the application to the CRTC, and you gave it your best effort, that's all that God wanted of you ... except for you to be thankful. "In everything give thanks" the Bible says. That means achievements and disappointments. Your obedience in this matter will not go unrewarded. "Blessings my friend.
ReplyDeleteRusty
That must be a big disappointment. I too felt disappointed when I heard that Christian radio would not be coming to Toronto, yet. Yet is the word I believe that you need to hold on to. It could very well be that you were called to do this to pave the way for Christian radio to come in the future. No one saw the Ryerson station loss coming, maybe another such circumstance is on its way? And maybe God has someone in mind to lead the way who would have been too scared to take that leap had there not been others who have gone before? Keep your eyes on God and above all, keep your eyes on LIFE. Sometimes satan uses disappointments or opportunities to distract us from what is right in front of us. LIFE is an amazing ministry to the people of central ontario and if that is all that God has you do with your life, I'd say you're not doing too badly ;)
ReplyDeleteLets show the winning applicants what Chritianity is all about.
ReplyDeleteLets BLESS THEM !! Congratulate them !! Support them !!
Lets not be SORE Losers but rather step up to the plate and
show them we are made from a different cut !!
Sometimes we are asking the wrong questions like (WHY)
That is a VICTIM question but we are VICTORS more than conquerors.
The question we need to be asking is What God do you want to be for me now that you could not be in the past ?
Scott Jackson is a Warrior he has changed the face of Christian Music as we know it to our culture. No warrior is ever produced without a fight.
But the biggest fight is always the one faught within.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog,
In similar situations I would review the process of the event and see how I had handled myself in a detailed way. (Character wise that is, did I displayed Jesus from start to finish, on and off the record?)
At the end of the day its always about how we are growing in Jesus !
Was it me alone that got this vision? Was there others? What have I done to promote unity as Jesus preached.?
what about if several Christians had a pro bike race.one will have to win? aint it? All are called to be victorious and to go through the experience and run the race. correct? What you take home from the race is what matters and prepares you for your next!
What if God just wanted to teach you lessons through the process? What if there was 7 Christians applications, that does not mean there are all called to win the frequency?
It does not matter what he give us to do. We just have to do it.we are his hands and feet on the earth. What if God told you you were not going to get it but I want you to go through the process .I am sure many of us would not of put our best efforts forward !
As the person said No warrior is ever produced without a fight.But the biggest fight is always the one faught within.
The inside have to be ready and be in positioned to steward the prize.
Maybe God has another plan. MAYBE He wants to show you that even though your "best work" wasn't good enough, that He is going to blow you away with what He is going to do in HIS strength. Just give it all to Him, and wait and see what He will do. He is the one in control after all.....
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you Scott
ReplyDeleteSomtimes God just asks you to take a "leap of faith". We need to take two steps in order to be lead. The first one just gets you movin'. The second allows God to change your direction.
Sometimes He asks us to step in one direction in order to carry us sideways to get us where He wants us to be.
Remember Isaiah 42:16....it is God who makes our crooked paths straight!
After all the discernment and prayer, you moved in the direction you felt God was calling you to move. That is all we are asked to do. God does not expect us to walk on water without His help, only to jump out of the boat when he calls us!
Know that you are all in my prayers!
Geof from Alliston
if you change your stations objective from making as much money as possible to delivering Gods message then you understand what Gods will is and you will follow that.
ReplyDeleteThere is more to life than your approach of vying for a 120k plus salary.
perhaps instead of the same comments advertising you could consider having a station that Christians would support unilaterally instead of a few here and there.
IF your intent was to make money from toronto to add to your salary that wont happen. God know the motives behind every action and this is a message to you to change what your station is about - from revenue collection and high salary - to Jesus.
Charles Stanley never begs for money as he knows he is doing Gods work and that God will provide. You dont believe God will provide and that is why you are always asking for money and this lack of faith is one of your roadblocks. you are not entitled to the salary you claim.
Hi Scott,
ReplyDeleteIf I can offer a similar prospective, I am a pastor without a pastoral role inside a church at the moment. I have been in the state for about a year now. I do pastoral ministry on Life every Monday night at 9 doing Ask The Pastor and I love doing that. I have had interviews this past year for pastoral roles and when it comes to that question about what pastoral work I'm doing I have said that while not currently in a church role, I am still doing pastoral ministry at Life - "Yes, but what church are you pastoring at?"
I have had great interviews with churches and they have told me so, then I get the "But we just felt we should go with another candidate." God knows why I haven't had a church pastoral ministry so far, and God knows why Trust Communications did not get 88.1. We have to trust that God knows exactly what He's doing - even if we can't see why right now.
The person above is harsh in their criticism and did not have the boldness enough to leave their name. There will always be neigh-sayers. If we know what we're called to do, then things like this while disappointing can be accepted as God has a different path for us to follow. We wait to see what His will is for us in these matters.
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
I know that sounds like a cliches verse at times like these, and so do verses like Proverbs 3:5,6 - yet they become even more important than ever during times of trial. We must trust that no matter what happens, God has our best interest in mind. He knows what is best for us. God was not taken by surprise by this. He didn't "wake up" and find the ruling didn't go the way He was expecting. He knew it wouldn't. They why maybe because He has something better in store!
People can pray for things to happen, but we have to hold them with open hands. A lot of people try to claim things in the name of Jesus and think because they have done so that their plans can't possibly fail. James 4:15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”
So all I have to say is, God closed this door for a reason, and we just pray that God will show us the why. He might not - consider that too - until we get to heaven. Just that He would give us that ability to accept His will, and be at peace with it. Perhaps a stronger frequency will suddenly become available later this year. We don't know. We just trust God no matter the circumstances. In times like these I think of that Matt Redman song, "Blessed Be Your Name" and lines taken straight from the book of Job abut how the Lord gives and the Lord takes away - blessed be the name of the Lord. We praise Him in times of blessing and praise Him "when there's pain in the offering - blessed be Your name."
You and Life and the listeners her and Toronto are in my prayers. As a born Torontonian I know what a game-changer it would have been to have Christian radio there. Obviously God just wants there to be more time and for it to be done a different way than what we were all expecting.
Be at peace Scott. You were faithful with what you had been given - and in God's eyes that means you were a "good and faithful servant."
God bless,
Pastor Andrew Robertson
Ask The Pastor Co-Host/Announcer
Life 100.3
pastor Robertson thats a load of quak.
ReplyDeletea organization founded for money wont get the favor of God. Scott thats a load of nonsense, at a normal place wouldn't you expect to get fired for going on a non stop radio rant for the tornto station, getting it all wrong - YES of course but this is where you get paid big bucks for no reason and you dont tell people how much money is spent to keep the station on air versus the salaries of those who need their diiner and mortgage paid as well
Just want everyone to know, I've read these comments. Thanks all for your perspective.
ReplyDeleteI have a question I wanted to know why Scott Jackson and his wife carry different last names before the C.R.T.C. Any reason in regards to Life FM .
ReplyDeletePastor Andrew You are correct only God knows why he did closed the door. Thanks for doing your job as a pastoral help to life Fm.
As a Christian and as much as I wanted a Christian radio in Toronto. Toronto does not represent what life FM plays. I do not believe Scott knows anything much about our communities in Toronto. I saw him at our church in Scarborough and having a mix of different ethnics groups on you panel (that I saw that in the Christian herald)does not convince me that you knew what the people wanted to hear on the radio.
There a few Disc Jockeys that developed Toronto music community at events an knows the people needs over the last 10 years such as ,DJ Lynn, DJ Evangelist ,DJ Anwar. These guys would have a better understanding of what a christian Toronto radio should be like. I believed one of these gentleman, was with the other applicants because his name was mentioned in the Christian herald and other news outlets.
By the way I can hear you very clear in Scarborough, sometimes all the way to Pickering and I am still looking forward for the correct radio for the Christian community.
Keep the Good work up
God bless
Jimmy Lue
I think we really just need to be ready and willing to accept no as an answer from God. His plans are not always our plans. As nice as Christian radio would be in Toronto, there is still a great ministry to be had in the current listening areas...as long as we do not neglect them. As for people saying that God told them that Christian radio was going to happen in Toronto, these people are people, not God. God has revealed all we need to know in His word.
ReplyDeleteOur real blessings often appear to us in the shape of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience and we soon shall see them in their proper figures.
ReplyDeleteMITD.
;-)